Leaving the familiar
""It feels like home in this place called familiar/When we're alone we return to familiar/You can't let go of this place called familiar/But we're orphans bound far away from familiar"" -- N.C. So...
View ArticleAnother update overdue
I feel like I've been stuck on auto-pilot this week. Empty. Numb. And yet--sometimes the feelings are so intense, so raw, that I don't know where to begin in dealing with it all, myself included. Yet...
View ArticleTough Days
March 15, 2006 I hate being in this place of ambiguity. Of not caring... of wanting everything yet nothing at all. I don't know. Lately I'm finding it hard to even want to be here. I start...
View ArticleLooking Ahead
I can't wait for this weekend! Wow-- that's a statement you won't hear me saying too often. But Pete is coming up to visit for a few days and will be here sometime early afternoon on Friday. I'm...
View ArticleIt's been awhile
Inpatient for 3 months, and I haven't updated too often here. It's been quite awhile since I've posted anything, so I figured it was time for an update. I've had my good weeks and my bad weeks--- as to...
View ArticleStill Inpatient
I thought I'd be out of here by March 8th. That was--apparently-- me being HIGHLY optimistic about the whole recovery thing, thinking that 8 weeks would be enough time to undo 16 years of eating...
View ArticleIt's been awhile
I'm still inpatient... still doing my best to keep moving forward, though each day is one more uphill battle. Somedays are pure hell--- Like last Monday. Here's the journaling from then. I apologize...
View ArticleHome, Finally
I know it's been forever and a day since I've updated in here. I was discharged from Westwind Eating Disorder Treatment Center on June 30, and arrived home on July 1. It's been just short of 6 months....
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New Job
Things are going ok here. I'm finally getting used to being at home and being away from Westwind. I see my therapist twice a week now, and that's going ok. Some sessions are better than others, but for...
View ArticleA Long Road
I've been out of IP treatment for almost 4 months now. Coming home and readjusting was almost harder than going in the first place. When you spend months and months, day after day in group therapy and...
View ArticleChanges
Just over seven months have passed since I left treatment. Every day is still a struggle, as I fight to keep moving forward, while old habits and methods of dealing with life still infiltrate my days....
View ArticleNew Year, New Start.... (maybe)
(also posted on my Xanga site, for any of you who visit both). A friend of mine, on her photo-blog wrote: "I guess that my career and my life will be filled with a perpetual struggle to find my voice....
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An Endless Uphill Battle
Since leaving treatment in July of 2006, I have done a lot of thinking. But even in the days and months spent trying to find answers and reasons, all I'm really left with is a lot more questions. How...
View ArticleNew Poem, "Mirrors and Glass"
I haven't really posted much of my poetry on here, but thought I'd post this one. I'd be interested in your thoughts on this.... Thanks! Wendy Mirrors and Glass Stare into mirrors, windows, glass-- any...
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